Life Detox

hey all

so, whenever i feel especially bogged down or just caught in life's clutter i do some sort of cleansing. normally, i purge my facebook--of friends, tagged photos, and profile shtuff--and that is sufficient. however, lately it just isn't enough. perhaps this is because i've run out of things to get rid of or perhaps this is because i need something a little more meaningful to upgrade.

currently, i am on a health-fix. character-fix. overall being-fix. life-fix.
--i've started running again (since i had shin splints last semester--ow).
--i've been transitioning into becoming a vegetarian.
--my dad (who is a chiropractor) gave me this detox kit, which i started the first of this month, that is supposed to rid your body of all the nasty and make you feel all good inside. :)
--i've started really sitting down and planning out my *immediate* future. goals, wants, necessities, etc.

to be honest, ever since i was little i thought that i would be a chef and own a restaurant. when it got to be time for my friends to start thinking about what they wanted to major in after high school, i started to second guess myself. however, at the time i just though it was because i had never really thought of what else i might want to do. i was almost afraid to think about what else i might want to do; to change my mind.

i have always been a slave to the stage. i was in musicals, plays, one acts, choir, a cappella, etc. thespians was pretty much my life. it consumed most of my free time. even though i have a love for it, i do not have the confidence of my ability to pursue it as a career. on top of that, i know that i am not as good as the other hundreds of women trying to "make it big"--and i'm okay with that. theater was the only other thing i could think of to study though...so what do i do?

currently i am a marketing communications major with a focus in public relations and a minor in women's studies. marketing is good...it comes naturally to me. creativity, people skills, public speaking skills (from the many years of theater). and women's studies has only become more interesting to me since i took a life-changing course by a wonderful woman at my high school, Ms. Moore. She is the sole reason that i even considered minoring in it.

however, even though marketing isn't bad...it's just not great. i'm not excited for classes. and on top of that, i don't feel challenged at my school. most of my teachers don't even have lesson plans...
i like structure. i like organization. i even like hw to a point. it reminds me that i'm not wasting my time and money (yes, i'm paying for school). but at my school, these things rarely occur.
why should i stay at a school that i don't feel challenges me?

NOW: i have no clue what i'm doing with my life.
all i know is that i'm leaving Chicago. i have my apartment until august and i will be going between St. Louis and Chicago during the summer, but after that i won't be back.
i have applied to Florida Gulf Coast University and University of Tennessee: Knoxville, and will possibly apply to University of South Carolina.

i need new. i need warm weather. i need a school that has a community. i need sports teams to root for, school colors to wear, and pride in my school.
i miss being school spirited like in high school.
i love chicago, but there is no community at Columbia. not the kind that i crave, at least.

perhaps i will continue my major/minor at whatever school i am at in the fall, or perhaps i will go into a full BA in women's studies so that i can possibly teach in the long run. who knows?

all i know, is that i'm getting out.
wish me luck.

pusshej,
jules